Everytime it feels like there's a season for change, things take a turn and it doesn't look as good as I thought it would be. I'm glad though that I've been blessed with a faithful spirit to believe that all things work for the good of those who love Him.
The change in this season looks like it could possibly unfold but amidst that growing little seed of happiness, there's still a whole lot of caution on what could happen and how things might not look so optimistic afterall. Pessimist Optimist.
I wondered about the road ahead, the expectations, limitations, difference in factors that may not be so real now and then a whole load of worry came piling up on my shoulders, even stripping the heart of that little joy that exists. The thoughts that build up can get intense and the heaviness from my shoulders seem to be able to spillover and creep into my heart. Argh, tiresome. To think or not to think.
Above all this, I wish I could speak it out and release the tension but alas.. that's not to be again. not M nor .. nor certain groups of people who only wish to be entertained.
I should at the end of the day, simply grow that faith, and commit the entirety to trust God that all things will fall into place and he will always be able to steady my heart. To do that, I need to stay focussed on Him.
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