betrayal?

A back stab to some,
Emotions filled with hatred for others..
my perspective's -a way to disappoint an act of love.
M asked me what drives me..
With no hesitation, I said 'Love'
Asked why..
it was simple,
in love , there is sincerity in giving.
and in giving I derive joy.
to friends, family, or even ppl i barely know.
If I could make 1 more person happier by spending even $1 on 3 packs of tissue
or.. buy mum a cook book when she least expects it..
or even being a supportive friend without expecting an equivalent return.
There's great joy in giving and yet when you give and give..
you're bound to face disappointments..

Perhaps disappointments that seem difficult to forget..
because in love u forgive and with that same source you draw strength to continue giving and
they still chose to leave u beaten down..
do they derive joy seeing u down,
a grave sense of betrayal filled e downcast mind,
couldn't stand up for a while..
but now.. I've learned that
giving's only for the deserving and
I should stop playing jesus..

I may just be a smashed snail if I tread on e wrong path again..
once smashed forever gone..
Need to harden my shell and stay in the snail cave for awhile..