I went back on sunday night feeling extremely moody.. ppl talked to me.. about the way I did things and it bothered me.. I saw the sisters in conflict and it was partly my fault..
feedback..not that I loathe it.. i suppose I generally care too much about what other people say .. their opinions on me.. and I did some reflection.. while I was driving.. and when I was home.. returning to an empty home .. (family was still out) just got more gloomy..
Was thinking .. have I been doing too much.. or have I been doing too little.. sometimes.. u do what you enjoy doing and u think it's good.. and then ppl tell u.. it isn't as good as u think it is.. people , me , people, me.. where is God then?
I decided to play the piano.. the only piece I can play now.. endless love.. and there.. my emotions were set free.. my nerves were soothed as the music played.. why had I placed so much stress on myself...
Family came home and weird me.. didn't feel like talking to anyone.. so I retired from the piano to shut myself up to the comforts of my room..
and so i spent a little time with God.. and I was reminded of the verse at church today..
Galatians 6:9 And let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart.
Indeed, I have seen bits of the harvest I never thought I would reap.
I understood myself a little better too.. that it was NOT being tired of doing all that im doing.. I enjoy what I'm doing , it makes me happy while I'm at it.. but when everything's over.. exhaustion eats me up..
I've overworked myself.. and I need to free out some time to pursue my personal activities to strike some balance.. In love I give .. and in the same way.. if I want to give it well I need to restore my soul too..
So that started today, I had 2 hours of netball with Germ and Glen n e rest and it was simply fantastic! Feeling all worked out and the stress that was building up was somehow released..
For now.. I'm feeling sick again with a bad throat, runny nose and watery eyes..
5 more days to the race and I've still got much to cover.. YIKES!!
My dad's words just rang in my head.. Everything must be done in moderation...
OF late I've been occupying myself with..
MHI meetings..
4 tuition kids..
Learning to play the piano..
Duathlon..
Now.. Netball..
hmm..
i think one has to go..
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
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